(This is one of those entries that will make little or no sense at all, but I have to post it anyway, because I can't save another draft.)
Change....it whimsically dances with my shadow, challenging me that tomarrow will be dramatically different from today.
I want to elaborate on this feeling that I have known for quite some time.
A hopeful circumstance to which I've always known. There is something intricately connected to my dreams, that sometimes, they appear not to be my own, but a reflection of my creator, who watches over my steps, as I take steps fo faith, towards His purposes.
Grandiose expectations whirl themselves into my path and I tend to think too much about how the world sees me or how the world sees themselves. Oh, I've fallen short too many times to promote this sort of rationalizing, however, it's better to know my shortcomings than to blindly stand behind them, as if I don't know any better.
"So, here I am." This is the the phrase that was born through my artwork in college, but it remains quietly within my heart, as to occasionally whisper, "I am me, I'm not going anywhere." Change will bound to occur, such as...multiple hair styles, losing or gaining 10 pounds, relationships, cities that I will live in, points of view I will explore, and the level of selfishness that will unfortunately harbor itself next to my delicate heart.
It's as though I have all the time in the world to change, however, all the while, I am constantly in motion (changing, regardless), attempting to regain composure after I've failed miserably to attain the respect I thought I had already earned, but it doesn't really matter because labels are full of pretense; they try to gauge our sense of self , all the while, acting as exterior deflections that sorely impersonate an attempt to persuade us that we matter, when really, we need the least of all to be blessed, to know the richness of hope, joy and peace. We can know Him, by praying His will be done in every breath we take and in every change that is relfected through our seeking hearts.
About Me
- Kimberly Colleen
- Why I write: language emerging truthfully as an intimate friend, overcoming obstacles, exposing flaws, accepting and practicing journaling as a gift, reflecting and gaining understanding from every experience, regardless of the outcome, generally finding a particular purpose in rambling; formulating and uttering an in-cohesive stream of consciousness, leaning indiscriminately towards acceptance and rejection; interrelating the need to be translated, writing both carefully and most carelessly, attempting to become in plain sight, underneath aluminum sky. Quotes that inspire me to share my narrative: “Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength.” -August Wilson Why do any art if you’re not going to bring out of yourself the thing that is most vulnerable and most precious, that has to be said? Why do something unless you’re really trying to get at what it’s really about? -Marc Kelly Smith, New York Times, June 3, 2009
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