broken dish #1

So, yeah, I dropped a dish. I mean, it fell off the counter because I don't have a proper drainer.
I need to buy a new one, but haven't. Instead, I have this peice of plastic that sits and does nothing. I'm so frustrated and well, I can't do anything at the moment. I don't have a broom and that's a whole other story...

So, I've been pretty busy with work. Rather working has been keeping me busy. I cleaned my apartment this weekend and id my laundry. That was a huge relief. I don't know why.
I went to the art store to buy a few things and spent $30 bucks. Ouch. Paint, a sketch notebook(for my friend Peter), erasers and transfer paper. Man, oh man.

So, I went home last weekend, like two weekends ago-really and I realized why I never really fit in with the larger crowd in High school. I was so quiet! My reunion was so different. I think I initiated conversations and if I didn't inititate, I actually talked to almost everyone that was there. The drama of a small town doesn't change though and I figured out why in the world I left and moved to NY.

A new identity? Sure, that was it. At home, I was known as A) the quiet girl B) the survivor C) Artist with a cause and now that I am in NY, I can't even describe my life or put it into words(though I am trying really really hard), but I am neither who I was, or who I want to be, and yet, I know I have so much to learn here, that I am not at all ready to return to the city that gave me life and shaped my calling that ultimately pushed me towards an island surounded by water.

Even though I have a fear of water, bridges and boats...ironically enough, I haven't forgotten my fears, but they have been grasped in a way that forces me to see them more clearly than ever. I don't know what this has to do with my broken dish, but the more I think about it, I know it's time to recognize some things in my life as broken and I've learned that the only way to cope is to pick them up...maybe not this minute, but maybe later or the morning, but if I leave things the way they are, my feet will only get cut up. That's no good....

Which reminds me of this quote:
"I have spread my dreams under your feet; tread softly because you tread on my dreams."
--William Butler Yeats--