Stillness.

What is that sound, I cannot hear, the space between, the lingering pause, I cannot pretend that my sorrow is diminishing. I keep thinking if I talk about him, if I look for him, he will not seem so far away, but then, I realize it is I, who is so far away, that I cannot hear anything, but my own deep breaths, the ones that catch up to my thoughts as I wonder, why and how and what now?

And it's not hard to fathom, it's not hard to understand that I am not alone, there are so many that feel the exact same way, that people are filled with the same sorrow....but under this current of tears, there is a new day arising, while He is already at peace.

I picked up my palette knife to paint and there was a release of pressure, a silence that I needed not to fill with anything other than a meditative prayer that made me realize that I only need to open my heart, to know that this is not the end, but a new beginning for all of us.